Laughing Matters

Laughing Matters

For the first time in a while or maybe ever I didn’t get so stressed that I just cried over imperfection.  I began making my kid’s birthday cakes several years ago because let’s face it they are expensive. Every year if we were having a party I would do a trial run of the cake a few weeks before.   I made a Rainbow Bright cake for Ariyah and it was one of the most hideous looking cakes ever.  I just couldn’t seem to get the eyes just right.   I am not an expert by any means, but instead of stressing as I usually would, I had to just laugh.  I called my husband to tell him how horrible the cake looked and which he replied, “If you aren’t crying it must be okay”.  Did I mention this was my first attempt at making her cake and the party was in an hour!   I just didn’t have time before this particular party.

The thing is the cake looked terrible, or should I say abnormal, but I was laughing.  I always want things to be perfect and to go the way they are planned, but that just isn’t life sometimes. Then it hit me it wasn’t about the cake because my five-year old loved it knowing I made it for her.  She knew I put time, effort and love into making the cake.  I have learned that life and family isn’t about everything going as planned.  Being a family isn’t about being perfect.  It is definitely not always pretty or even good at times.  Moreover, the hideous soul crushing moments are also what define us, what makes us stronger more compassionate as well as loving people.

Sometimes we have to laugh at things we can’t control so that it doesn’t crush us.   When my dad was battling cancer we often got many confused looks because we would laugh, so we wouldn’t cry.   His pain increased over the last few months of his life and some days he would ask me to not make him laugh, because it hurt more than it helped.  I never will forget in his last few days, Ariyah climbed in the hospital bed with him and held his hand and told him it was going to be okay and that she would miss him, but she would see him again in Heaven one day.  These comforting words came from a five year-old who loves her Granddaddy, but recognized that he was not getting better and life just wasn’t good in that moment of pain.  He smiled at her and hugged her and told her she was correct and that he would see her again in Heaven.

My dad needed to hear those exact words.  I wasn’t ready to utter those words to my Dad, but God used her.  God never promised us a life without strife, or that things would go as we planned only that he would never leave us.  Even in moments of great grief and pain it is important that we lift up our hands and thank God for another day of life with the ones we love no matter what we are facing and for the moments we were allowed to share with them in this life.   I thank God that I am wonderfully made to Him.  He is the God who sees me, with all my hideous flaws, imperfections and that He loves me anyway.


Psalms 139:14 –I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made: your works are wonderful, I know that full well.